Reflections

 

 Catherine and Landon Edwards 14 Jan 2012

Patrick and Raymond Zmolek 19 Feb 2007

There are times that make you look back at events in your own life.  The life of Landon Vick Edwards is one of those times.  Landon spent all two hours of his life in his mother's arm, before leaving this world.  I would like to consider myself good friends of the mother and her family, and their loss is heart breaking.  I remember the first time I held my son Raymond in my arms, and how precious it was to me.  Back then, I did not know that our time would be cut shorter then I would have liked, and I could only imagine what was going through Landon's parents minds, knowing that he was not going to be in this world long (he was premature and weighed only 4 lbs 10 oz).  While my heart grieves for their loss, it has forced me to look back at my own loss, even though my circumstances are quite different.  I think about the times playing catch with dad in the yard my boys will miss, the important father/son talks that they will miss out on, and being there to comfort them as a father when they hit rough spots in their life, or helping them to make important life changing decisions.  I really do not know who has it worse, them or me.  I am missing out on all the important milestones in their life, and cannot share in their joys, and help them in their sorrows, but they on the other hand do not have their father figure with them to help and guide them on their way.  I guess I should take comfort in the fact that even though they are not with me, they are somewhere, and that there is still a chance that I may be reunited with them some day.  To be honest, though, I have all but lost hope.  the best that I can do is hold on to what memories I have, and take comfort in the fact that they were well spent, and I have no regrets about how I raised my boys.  I wish my boys the best, even though I am not their.  Love you Raymond, and love you Tyler.